I recently read a list from Men’s Health titled, “50 Things Women Wish Men Knew”.  Well, I don’t agree with a lot of the ‘things’ so I’m writing a personal list.

  1. Screw coffee, invite me to go to the soda shop or Sno-Cone shack with you. I am lactose intolerant, and can’t have most of the stuff from Starbucks.
  2. I hate it when people invite me out on a date, and then spend the time on their cell phones. Unless you are trying to show ME something, I am more important than your texts.
  3. I find bards HIGHLY sexy.  Sing me a song, tell me a story, dance, or play a guitar to get my attention.
  4. Come up behind me, hug me around the waist, and kiss my neck, and you can pretty much get whatever you want.
  5. I’m a sucker for chivalry.  If you speak softly and kiss my hand, I melt.  Open doors, it makes me happy.
  6. I am just as afraid to hit on you as you are to hit on me.
  7. I notice kindness. I also notice ass-hattery. I keep it quiet that I notice either.
  8. I wouldn’t have gone on a date with you if I didn’t see value in you, don’t continue berating yourself, and talking about how “You don’t see what I could possibly see in you”, it makes me think perhaps I was wrong.
  9. Every girl’s crazy bout a sharp dressed man, especially this girl.
  10. I like a nicely put together person, not a metro guy who takes longer to get ready than me.  I’m low maintenance. Including make-up, it takes me under 20 minutes to get ready… 30 if I need a shower.
  11. I’m poly. It doesn’t mean you will mean any less to me just because I love other people too.
  12. I have only ever gotten flowers from two people. I love flowers, it will set you apart.
  13. I hate oral on me, please stop trying to do it. It just annoys me and no, you really DON’T know some secret trick.
  14. I like sex, porn, and foreplay A LOT.  This doesn’t mean I ALWAYS want sex, stop pestering, it’s unattractive.
  15. Unless you are very teeny tiny downstairs, I genuinely DON’T CARE how big your Johnson is.  Stop worrying.
  16. I generally put out on the first date, unless you fuck up.
  17. I am not a booty call technician. If you invite me out for a date, I’m gonna be mighty pissed if you invite me to your bedroom before we go anywhere.
  18. I wear short skirts, low-cut tops, high heels, and form-fitting clothing for a reason.  Feel free to compliment me accordingly.
  19. “God your tits look good” is NOT a good compliment.
  20. If you EVER call me a cunt, whore, cum dumpster, etc., expect to get kicked in the shins, HARD.
  21. If you treat my family like crap, you have NO shot with me.
  22. Don’t ask my opinion if you aren’t prepared for any answer.
  23. If you can’t make decisions, I will. Either don’t bitch about my decision, or make the decision yourself.
  24. I love movies and movie theaters.  There are no categories of movies I DON’T watch.
  25. Chick flicks are the lowest movie category on the list.
  26. I’m a geek. I love WoW, ancient history, art, books, board games, Dr. Horrible, Firefly, Dr. Who, Monty Python, and many other geeky things.
  27. I don’t mind if you play video games, but it is still a game. I am more important.
  28. I highly dislike watching sports. If I leave the room, you haven’t done something wrong. It’s me, not you.
  29. I love to cook.  I also love a man who cooks for me.
  30. I like sex rough. REALLY rough.
  31. I will ask you if I look nice.  I may still change even if you say yes.  Don’t take this as a personal insult.
  32. “Does this look good on me?” is NOT a trick question. I want an honest answer, if I look like crap, tell me.
  33. I am not hesitant to talk about much. If I am, it’s probably for damned good reason. Don’t push.
  34. If I say I am “Fine”, I’m not. If I say I’m “peachy”, fucking run!
  35. Sarcasm and picking on you means I like you.
  36. I’m poly, not a robot. I still get jealous. I still get insecure. I still like to feel special.
  37. My nipples belong on my body, they are NOT meant to be torn from me and thrown beneath my curio cabinet.
  38. You have common courtesy from me until you prove you don’t deserve it. Likewise, you do not have my respect until you have proven you DO deserve it.
  39. I hate the terms “holla”, “ey mami”,”sooki sooki”, and “hey bitches”
  40. Febreeze was invented for a reason, please for the love of the gods, if your domicile smells like B.O., weed, sex, ass, or last weeks taco night, spritz accordingly if you know I’m going to visit.
  41. I’m bi. I like men and women. I stare at, hit on, and enjoy the company of both. This DOES NOT mean I hit on anything with a human pulse. I still have taste.
  42. I’m a klutz. Please don’t make a huge ‘thing’ of it. It makes me feel stupid.
  43. I am definition based. Ambiguity annoys me to no end. If you love me, tell me. If you don’t want to see me again, don’t tell me you’ll call me.
  44. I may not like how I look, but I am comfortable with my body. Modesty isn’t my strong point.
  45. I love the great outdoors.  I love to hike, camp, and spend time outside.
  46. I like to snuggle, and get pet on, a lot.
  47. I don’t own pants… stop joking how cold I must be every time you see me in a skirt.
  48. I may be a slut, but I’m still a lady.
  49. Manly men make me happy.
  50. Open communication is the key with me, if you are ambiguous with me, expect the same with me.

2 responses »

  1. kittengrl says:

    Well said. I think know some men who would do to take some pointers. This list fits several women I know for the most part, including myself.

  2. Manna says:

    37 & 42.
    For Reals.

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